Infected...

Today was just as any other day. Just relaxing after a hard day of trying not to work really hard. Then I got a call. A close friend let me know she had contracted a case of syphilis from some dude she thought she was in love with. Now, even though we talked everything out, and found out that this thing was curable, I was scared shitless. Not because of catching something from her, but, just the whole idea of mortality in your face. It's a frightening thing to have your life flash before your eyes because of someone else's mistake, but, I feel things a bit deeper for others than I think I should.

Disrespected...

How could one person do this to another? Love is used so loosely that sometimes you're not even sure who you're sharing a moment with anymore. I'm starting to think the phone sex I have daily, might give me a nasty case of ear infection. When did it become this life threatening?? I use sex as my liberation, my religion and my freedom. Although this has not happened to me, I consider it a sign, a warning and a wake up call that I hit the snooze button on. I have sex as often as I can, but I'm protected, but now that I'm thinking about it, am I really?

Protected...

I think the nature of my being has been forever changed. I'm starting to think the freedom I allowed intercourse to give me may alter my perception altogether. Maybe this will all be over in the morning when I give my thank you's for living and breathe a sigh. Thanking the Gods that it wasn't me who had a lapse of judgment because my inbetweens got hot. But, honestly, I'm starting to view my whole sexual view differently. Maybe it isn't what I thought it was. Maybe it isn't a freedom, but a death sentence with a passionate kiss. Maybe my liberation was just a temporary set of handcuffs, hoping that I didn't get caught in the crosshair. Maybe this will all be a shattered memory of how I used my/his body for pleasure. Maybe this is the point where I start to view sex for what it's really supposed to be for. Procreation, and love. In all sense of the confused meaning.

Be safe...

This is for you...

I spoke to my cousin yesterday. She's in a bit of a quandary. Love eludes the both of us. Eludes us so, that, we've thought of new explorations and new adventures to embark on. My previous mishaps have led me here, so, I'm tired of being a sexual Indiana Jones, trying to find my lust-filled Temple of Doom.

So, Coco...

The days are hot and lazy with the thoughts of summer love. You know the kind. Lights off, heat radiating off of the lover of choice while the street lights peek inside the windows hoping to steal a glance of naked bliss. This has been a secret mission of mine for some time now. I've been wanting to experience some project ambient intercourse right now. Project ambient is, what I've explained above, added with no fan, loud systems below, a skyline out the window, with low guttural tones from you and your lover. The most carnal, animalistic event there could be. The city sounds tapping on the bubble you've created with your other for the night.

Write...

I've told several people that I haven't had the heart to write lately. Which is true. Life has been a stressful battle for a while, and writing just hasn't relieved me like I've needed it to in the passed weeks. But, I'm noticing, writing is like the relationship that still needs work, even though you're thinking it's not sustaining you for whatever reason. Referred to as my husband, writing, has been off my mind lately. He hasn't been coming around lately. I haven't been keeping up on my end either. I've been slacking. But with these words, I'm working on the relationship. I need to revive new life into this union. It's my peace. So, I've made promises to him [writing], and I'm remaining true.

I can only try...

Burners & Tags...

I think every woman feels this way at one time or another. You have to build a brick exterior to shield the hurt that is hurled toward you. Even still, ways are always found inside. Once situations are over and done with, nothing is left but their spirits scribbled on you in some way, shape or form.

I've been feeling like this lately.

Got an eraser?